Saturday, March 08, 2008

14 months

14 months:

That's how long Tripp Isenhour will spend in jail thinking about his over-reaction.

14 months:

For completing a "one-in-a-million-shot" to the chest of an endangered Red Hawk, sentencing it to death.

14 months:

Nearly 1 month in jail per swing he took trying to stop the bird from squawking during his precious golf tips show.

14 months:

To locate new a resort that will allow him to film his instructional videos, since Grand Cypress (where he was filming) revoked his practice passes after the incident.

14 months:

To figure out how to recover from this PR disaster, so brutal, that even his 3 adopted cats are distancing themselves from him.

14 months:

For Tripp, an accomplished cook, to figure-up new recipes to serve to his fellow players when he returns from his penalty box...

...word has it that endangered fowl will not be on the menu.

14 months:

An accomplished YellowJacket and top 10 money winner in '06, that has been clawing (pun intended) his way back into the PGA ranks via taking his lumps on the Nationwide Tour... Tripp will have some time now to figure how to get his slumping birdie and eagle stats up from golf's murky word yet on his hawk stats...

...but we know his driving accuracy is spot-on.

Thanks for reading. Keep it in the short-grass,



Koba said...

I think you mean to say "14 months. That's how long Tripp Isenhour MIGHT spend in jail..." I would be shocked if he even spends a day in the slammer -- my guess is he'll pay a nice sized fine and do some PSAs.

Sean @ Deep Rough said...

Crazy situation. At first, I thought, wow, how could this guy face any jail time for this. Then I heard him saying he hit a bunch of balls 'toward' the bird...just trying to 'scare it off'. Right.

Sure, 14 months may be excessive, but come on...this is something I'd expect some teenagers at the driving range to do, not a tour pro...

Goods said...

I agree with KOBA. I've seen nothing re: Isenhour doing time, let alone 14 months.

If they decide to throw the book at him, that's one thing. But he's so high profile, he'll get probation and do some animal preservation PSA's