Monday, February 06, 2006

Ripley's planned golf museum

I picked a newspaper off the floor while on the head, in an esteemed Southern CC lockeroom (which shall go un-named), and read an article that caught my attention. I'd like to share the gist of that story to you.

It appears that Ripley's Believe it or Else is expanding their franchise, and is digging ground on a new museum showcasing golf oddities.
The Chief Floccinaucinihilipilification Inspector's from Titless, Maxcrash, Dunplop, and Taylor Made-in-China, were gathered at a banquet celebrating failed test-products that, although are worthless to a golfer, are a treasure trove for the museum and it's legion of oddball-searching visitors.

....OK....I know what you're thinking: "this is the last time I read this guys' blog"......but wait! Before you leave, I went on the Believe it or Else website for a preview of items. I think the site address was thpft.stupidgolfideas.pfft ..... anyway.....I'll let you in on a preview.

One of the former inspectors (whose floccinaucinihilipilification escaped him on this fateful day) shows two balls that would not go straight. The now-defunct manufacturer made one that hooked, and another that would slice. They made millions of these balls. Well, according to who you talk to at the plant, either a mix-up happened in the packaging process, or the secret flight-schematics were "mysteriously" embellished.....at any rate, no one could tell you what the balls would do once you hit them.
He told the story of then-president Gerald Ford (who used his political influence to get the first-to-market products) and how the story of he being a bad golfer, was actually a cover-up by the ball manufacturer's lobbyist. Ford was actually a scratch golfer, but he used these balls the first time in the Crosby Open when he hit 3 women and 2 kids in the gallery with his drives.
He could never live that rap down as the media pounced on the story (as well as images of maimed spectators) like Pooh on honey, and......well, the rest as we say is history.....just the kind of history for Ripley's Believe it or Else.

But, as solace, the next time you slice or hook a shot......you can go ahead and blame it on a lack of floccinaucinihilipilification.

Thanks for reading, keep it in the short-grass.


JFB

No comments: